18 Pax gathered in the gloom for my 5 year F3 Anniversary. There was a special guest appearance by the affable Hey Big Papi. He was on a paired down version of “The Rascal!” It really needs some streamers. We welcomed Chair Force coming from someplace I can’t remember. Time was called.
I informed the pax that if Zamboni could guess what I would call for the first warm-up exercise, it would be a burpee free beatdown. He called Monkey Humpers. He was wrong. Smurf Jacks. Then we did some other stuff. Mosey around the parking lot, grab your cindy and head to the pavilion.
I thought about re-creating the very first workout I did when I came to F3. It was a Lifo beatdown that lasted 17 hours. However I remembered that I did that LAST year for my four year anniversary.
Scratch that. Instead I came up with the following:
40’s (borrowed and modified from F3 Greenwood)
Line up cindy’s and complete the following. Do 35 curls and 5 overhead presses. Run to opposite end of field and complete 35 merkins and 5 Squats. Run back and complete the grid.
Curls/OH Presses Merkins/Squats
Hey Big Papi immediately inquired if this was the best I could come up with as he lounged on his rascal and pulled out his cross-stitch needle. Lots of grumbling that we didn’t warm up shoulders more.
The next part of the show consisted of traversing the field doing 10 murder bunnies and 15 block swings til you get to the far side. Then do it again.
After that nonsense we did four rounds of the following:
5 Manmakers, 15 big boy situps. Run to the far side. 5 merkins. Run back.
These instructions had to be given multiple times. 5 means 5. Hey Big Papi; concerned that NO ONE had announced that the grass was wet, announced that the grass was wet.
With time still on the clock, pax were instructed to rifle carry across the field and for the benefit of Gekko, we did 5 blockees. Snuffy commented that it should be 10 for the train however I informed him that the train came prior to the start of the workout and in accordance of Section 2, subsection 7, paragraph -9 of the rules that govern appropriate allocation of burpees when there’s a train; “After the calling of the start of a beatdown, should a train/locomotive or facsimile thereof pass by the AO, pax are obligated to complete 10 (ten) burpees in honor of said procession.” Circle up had not been called. Snuffy was then reminded that his last Q was during the Reagan administration.
Rifle carry to the flag and end.
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I’m super honored to have you guys in my life.
Quote from Erwin Rommel, “Don’t fight a battle if you don’t gain anything by winning.”