“SPARTANS, WHAT IS YOUR PROFESSION?” – King Leonidas

Slowly, through the fog and sound of crashing waves emerged 16 Pax.  Their agoge to join the legion of Spartan warriors before them would begin on this cool and foggy morning.

Warmup:

Side Straddle Hop x 20

Windmill (F3 Resources calls it a Toy Soldier) x 10

Monkey Humpers x10

Enough warmup! On with THE THANG:

The Spartans began their mosey to the beach. It was at the Gate gas station (0.5 miles) that the Spartans saw a Trojan horse, a white F150. At the sight of the Spartan warriors, the Trojan horse opened its hatch to reveal 24 cinder blocks, numerous 5 gallon buckets, shovels, and nylon straps. Stunned at the sight of the contents of the Trojan horse, the Spartans quickly formed into 5 separate mora. Each mora obtained 2 cinder blocks, 1 shovel, 1 bucket, and 1 nylon strap.
The morae then moseyed as quickly as possible to the beach (0.25 miles). At the beach they ran calf deep into the icy water of the Atlantic. Using their shovels, each mora filled their 5 gallon bucket with wet sand and water. Each bucket now weighed approximately 80 lbs (5 gal bucket x 0.7481 ft^3/gal x 125#/ft^3 density of wet sand). The Spartans then formed into 5 separate phalanxes along the loose dry sand and dunes. Once lined up, each phalanx tied the 2 cinder blocks together and maintained a leash in which they would use to drag the blocks when ordered. Each of the 5 phalanxes consisted of 3 Spartan warriors side by side.

An eerie silence fell among the warriors as they stood side by side on that dark and foggy dawn. When ordered, each of the 3 warriors in a phalanx would perform one of the following obstacles:

Obstacle 1 (Please! May I have another Burpee): Mosey 50 meters, turn around and mosey back to start. At the starting line perform 30 Burpees in honor of those that have fallen.

Obstacle 2 (Block Drag): Drag 2 cinder blocks 50 meters, turn around and drag the blocks back to the starting line. At the starting line perform 30 Burpees in honor of those that have fallen.

Obstacle 3 (Bucket Brigade): Carry at chest height, the 80# bucket of wet sand and water 50 meters, turn around, and carry the bucket back to the starting line. At the starting line perform 30 Burpees in honor of those that have fallen.

At the completion of this set of obstacles, each warrior would then rotate and perform 1 of the other obstacles. This was repeated for a total of 4 sets.

Once 4 sets were complete, the battle weary warriors were ordered to empty their buckets of sand and mosey back to South Beach Park.

COT – Welcomed the FNG who looked identical to Steve Rogers, aka Captain America. Due to the DC Comics and Marvel Universe conflict, the name Captain America could not be used. Steve Rogers’ twin will now be known as Capt’n.

Brobucks at Panera Bread commenced.

Naked Moleskin:

The obstacles used this morning were straight out of the Spartan Race playbook; the Bucket Brigade (~80 lb bucket), the Block Drag, and 30 Burpees (for each failed obstacle at the race). The goal for the Pax was to find your maximum effort of exertion without gassing out. There’s no sense in going 100% during an obstacle, then sucking wind for the run to the next obstacle. Learn to pace yourself and break up obstacles into sets. Carry the bucket 15 meters and then catch your breath. Break the 30 burpees into 2 sets of 10 followed by 2 sets of 5. Use the time between sets to catch your breath. Doing 30 burpees unbroken and then being unable to run does nothing for the F3 team.

One last shout out to Dill Pickle!  This kid didn’t want to modify the workout.  He dragged the same blocks and carried the same buckets as all the other men.  Great job out there Dill Pickle!