Beatific Beatdown

A lucky 13 PAX came out of the gloom and inhabited Memorial Park for a memorable, dare we say beatific beatdown on a warm early AM. Just as life runs in circles, so did the PAX circle and swirl (and sweat) around the ever-handy and -inspiring F3Jax Shovel Flag, defiantly planted in the center of the park.

After a careful review of the Exicon, YHC came up with the following:

Warm-ups–Done in units of 8 (see below for rationale)

o SSHs
o LBACs—frontward
o LBACs–backward
o Don Quixotes
o Rockette Hillbillies—left/right—“1-2-3-4-5-6-7-ONE…”
o Tara Lipinskis (Nancy Kerrigans)—Left Leg, then Right
o Circle Burp—run in pla until first Pax calls it! Go around the circle

· Routine—Bataan Death March

o Mosey around the park perimeter
o Last guy in line drops & does 8 Merkins
o Catches up—taps the last guy & says “You’ve got the 6!”—goes to front

· 6MOM—feet toward the Shovel Flag
o Dolly, High Dolly, LBCs, Flutter Kick, Horizontal Scissor Kick, Vertical Scissor Kick, Russian Twist

THEME—The Beatitudes–8 Beatitudes, 8 Stations

o Teams of 4
o After completing each station, Bear Crawl to the Shovel Flag, Carioca back to the next station
o If you get to the next station and a group is still there, plank until they’re done

· The 8 Stations

o “blessed are the poor in spirit”—Around the World Lunges (Daft Punk)
o “blessed are those who mourn ”—Baltimore Special—20 Crab Cakes
o “blessed are the meek”—Bear Crawl to the Shovel Flag; Carioca back
o “blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness”— Around the World Plank-a-Rama
o “blessed are the merciful”—Wheelbarrows (out & back—teams of 2)
o “blessed are the pure in heart”—Deconstructed Burpees—2 sets of 5 each
o “blessed are the peacemakers”— Diamonds–2 sets of 8
o “blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness”—10 Louganises (coupons supplied by the PAX)

COT/BOM

We considered the story of the Original Fail, AKA Genesis 3.
After a brief review of Fartsack as both a noun and a verb, we thought about how Adam in essence Fartsacked his responsibility as a HIM.
It’s always interesting to note that he wasn’t out naming the animals or something while Eve was being tempted, he was right there by her side. (You could look it up.)

YHC reminded the PAX that, just as F1 and F2 don’t come rolling in to one’s life on a tray, so it is with F3. As a most excellent Dancing Idiot (St. Paul) once wrote to a young associate,
Physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.

(Said Dancing Idiot’s actual dance consisted of a total focus and reliance on the 3rd F in consultation with the Sky-Q, which he realized and modeled for the PAX of his day.)

The 3rd F, like the other two, must be PURSUED to be attained. There is no other way. Each PAX in attendance was reminded that, as a Man, he has a kingdom. And the prosperity of his kingdom, and all who are in it, depend in large measure of whether said Man will Fartsack his responsibilities, or not.

There were many prayer requests and concerns, which YHC realizes is both life as it really is, and a reflection of the level of comfort & trust experienced by the PAX in attendance. As Old Lodge Skins would say, “My heart soars like a hawk!” (From a great movie–you could look that up too.)

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