Bait and Switch Broga

Posted on Posted in Backblasts
  • When: 7/25/18
  • QIC: Bada Bing
  • The PAX: Papa Smurf (Double Respect), Outhouse, Check Please, Gravy, Osteen, Inside Out, PomPom, Seinfeld, Blackout (respect), Snooki, Skim, *69

It is a well known fact that YHC has been on the IR for a few days now and has been doing nothing but deep stretching and lower back therapy since “the incident.” With that said, YHC has been jonesing to share some sweat with the PAX. Of course, what better way to see my F3 brothers than at the weekly Broga Q or as some refer to as a “day of restoration” to which I generally agree. Broga, although difficult in it’s own respect, is seen as more of an active rest day to keep the PAX limber, flexible and injury free, but today would be different. YHC thought it time to pull the bait and switch (which didn’t totally come out of left field as YHC had posted hints on Slack around a Deck of Death of sorts). I digress. 

13 PAX arrived with their broga mats around the mosquito infested flagpole enjoying some good mummblechatter when low and behold a kotter shows up out of nowhere…Who might this be in the gloom but none other than *69. Welcome back brother. I thought that 5:13am text was kind of odd. We were also graced with Osteen’s presence at what I believe to be his very first broga sesh. Glad I prepared! 

YHC kicked up the Southern Rock, disclaimer was given and we got started with some light stretching. All things were going as planned…it was the definition of Restorative. 

The Warmorama included some new combo exercises such as: 

  • Downward Dog + Pigeon Stretch
  • Downward Dog + Updog
  • Warrior 1 Chinooks – both sides
  • Warrior 2 Little Baby Arm Circles – both directions
  • Warrior 2 Moroccan Night Clubs
  • Reverse Warrior + Extended Side Angle
  • Cat Cows + Twists
  • Low Lunge + Half Splits

YHC then gives a quick soapbox about 10 Things that take zero Talent but will get you 100% Respect. 

  1. Being on Time
  2. Work Ethic
  3. Effort
  4. Body Language
  5. Energy
  6. Attitude
  7. Passion
  8. Being Coachable
  9. Doing Extra
  10. Being Prepared

At this point YHC pulled the Deck of Cards out for Deck of Death to see if we could get through 52 cards in 30 minutes. Here were the rules: 

  • Hearts = Squats x Numbered Card
  • Diamonds = Merkins x Numbered Card
  • Clubs = Mountain Climbers x Numbered Card
  • Spades = Freddy Mercury Bicycles x Numbered Card
  • Jacks = SSH’s in Cadence x 11
  • Queens = Supermans x 12
  • Kings = Monkey Humpers x 13
  • Aces = Lunges around the circle approx. 14 on each leg
  • Jokers = Lindsay Lohan (unfortunately these were used entirely too early in the beatdown)

YHC kept the PAX moving and the PAX gave maximum effort without ever leaving the circle. WOW! Why not add 2 60-second laps around the parking lot to see what the PAX have left in the tank. Laps were successful and only 1, 10-Burpee penalty given for a debatable foot fault but nonetheless.

Totals: 54 merkins, 54 Freddy Mercury’s (ea leg), 54 mountain climbers (ea leg), 54 squats, 44 side straddle hops in cadence so approx. 132, 48 Superman’s, 52 monkey humpers, 56 lunges (ea leg), 2 60-sec laps, 10 burpees, 3 Lindsay Lohan’s, and some arm circles, downdogs, updogs and warrior poses.


Prayer request for Gravy’s son, *69 job, those on IR. 


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